Caliente Restaurant in San Pedro

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comments 5

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  UwU O.O

  :: 09 November 2025 02:30:57

  The staff are extremely friendly, and chatted us up. LGBT friendly. The birds in the yard were a major highlight. Close to the pier. The food was delicious and reasonably priced. I love that they didn't blast loud music. I had a very positive experience here, and will definitely be back.

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  Anson Thompson

  :: 06 November 2025 19:06:50

  I staggered into this godforsaken paradise of Belize like a rum-soaked apparition, the kind that the vultures mistake for fresh roadkill on the Hummingbird Highway, my veins humming with the ghost of mescaline dreams and the relentless equatorial sun beating down like God’s own sledgehammer on my sunburnt skull. Placencia? Christ, it’s less a town than a fever dream stitched together from driftwood shacks and palm fronds that whisper lies about eternal youth. And there, behind the scarred mahogany bar of the Laughing Lizard Lounge—squinting through the haze of conch smoke and ganja fumes—sat Brandon, that wild-eyed son of a beachcomber, his skin etched like an ancient Mayan glyph under a perpetual layer of salt and regret. Brandon. Jesus, what a specimen. Part pirate, part prophet, all menace wrapped in a faded Bob Marley tee that smelled of brine and betrayal. He’d washed up here years ago, or so the locals mutter over their Belikin beers, fleeing some cartel bloodbath in the Yucatán or maybe just the nagging specter of a Vegas divorce settlement. Doesn’t matter. The man’s got eyes like polished obsidian, the kind that size you up and decide if you’re worth the .38 he keeps tucked in his boot, right next to the vial of crocodile tears he swears came from a jaguar’s widow. “Fear and loathing in the tropics, doc,” he growled that first night, sliding a fistful of ice-cold Pacificos my way while the ceiling fan churned the air into a tepid soup. “You chase the dragon here, it bites back with teeth like coral reefs.” But the seafood—ah, sweet mother of Leviathan, the seafood at the Laughing Lizard is the sort of unholy revelation that makes a man question his atheism. We’re talking lobster tails the size of switchblades, grilled till they weep garlic butter and sin, hauled fresh from the Barrier Reef that morning by Brandon’s cadre of barefoot divers who commune with barracuda like old drinking buddies. Conch ceviche that hits like a shotgun blast of lime and habanero fury, raw and pulsing with the ocean’s feral heartbeat, served on cracked coconut shells that crunch under your molars like the bones of forgotten empires. And the snapper? Fried whole, eyes bulging in accusatory glee, doused in a sauce so black and brooding it could’ve been distilled from the ink of squid assassins. I devoured three platters that night, washing them down with Brandon’s “special” rum punch—a elixir of overproof white lightning, coconut milk gone rogue, and God knows what jungle distillate that left me hallucinating mermaids arm-wrestling iguanas on the dock. By dawn, as the howler monkeys screamed obscenities from the mangroves and the tide clawed at the pilings like a junkie denied his fix, I realized the truth: Belize isn’t a vacation, it’s a verdict. Brandon’s your judge and jury, the Laughing Lizard your courtroom, and that seafood? It’s the electric chair—exquisite, inevitable, and liable to fry your soul straight to paradise. Come if you dare, but pack your demons; they’ll feast harder than you do.

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  Todd Millines

  :: 25 October 2025 10:34:32

  Seriously, the best fried fish I’ve ever had in my life. Please do not tell my mother. The fish was so flavorful fried rice. Everything was awesome. The staff Brandon was attentive, pleasant and enhanced the meal with his lively interactions. This is worth the trip.

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  David Bennett

  :: 29 August 2025 18:55:57

  AMAZING. This is the place to go on Ambergris Cay. Best food. Best service. Best atmosphere. Bar none. This isn't just the best place I've been on the island, it's the best I've been to on any island. GO THERE. Its family ran by a husband and wife, even thier son helps run the place when they take a night off. We had fish, lobster, steak and pork tacos. The homade salsa and sauces were the best in my life. My wife wanted to take the bottle home. I had to stop her. Absolutely the best example of a Coconut curry ever. We had to eat here two nights in a row.

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  Kim Franco

  :: 27 August 2025 20:07:59

  Ohhh my goodness!! This place is a must try when you come to San Pedro. 100+ review. Treat you like family when you walk up with smiling faces, cheerful attitudes and a hand shake. Top notch customer service. I have never been to a place in the US that treat their patrons this well. The food!!! EXCELLENT!!! Ordered the Bacon wrapped shrimp and the curry plate with lobster. No words but…..YUMMMMM. Will definitely go again. Thank you for the key lime pie for my birthday. Delish 😋